JuliaaKh_Manners

The scottish proverb says:"Meat makes, and clothes shapes, but manners make a man". In fact, manners show who you are, and they value so much.They describe the person, his/her way of life, personality, qualities. Manners depend on the atmosphere where a man is born and brought up.I think that it's a very important thing in a person's life. To live well in a society, money alone is not enough. We should also have good manners, for it is human nature to seek friendship; and friendship cannot be bought with money. In the childhood our parents wanted and tried to teach us to good manners, (e.g. to greet older people, to stand up when a teacher enters, not to talk while eating, wash hands etc.) because well-mannered people are always welcome to everyone, and they have a lot of friends, it can create a good impression about you.But a man, whose manners are bad has no respect for others. He might be offensive to some people, he is rude. He uses words carelessly and behaves rudely towards other. In the end, it is he himself who suffers the most. Everyone avoids him. As we see manners show our personality. However, it often depends on the situation. Occasionally, we don't know what to do in many situations, e.g. when don't understand your interlocutor's speech well, you don't know how to ask him to repeat. The similar situations might make people feel embarrassed. As everyone I had the same cases. Once I went to my friend and it turned out, that there was her sister's birthday. I didn't know wht to do, because I was without any present.I couldn't go away and I had to say that I would give present later. I felt really embarrassed. Actually there are a lot of cases, where you would feel nervous, because you can have problems in communication, that is when we don't know what to say and how to say. E.g. when you meet your boyfriend and girl-frien's parents for the first time, socialising at a party where you only know one or two people; making a complaint. The expert on communication skills Rosemary Bailey explained reasons why it occurs.e.g. in a party full of strangers, people are nervous because unsure of what they're talking about and who they're talking about.Common mistakes are when people speak too much, ask too much questions, like an interrogation; look at someone too long. It can seem that we are aggressive towards them. Making complaint mistakes: 1. to say far too much and quickly (they become very unclear about the nature of complaint); 2. not to listen enough to what the other person had said (emotions).It's difficult to handle similar situations. Tips:1. to think, to plan; 2. make sure the sentences are short; 3. wait and listen to a response; 4. summarise and test your understanding. Rosemary considered these tips important because they help to build relationships successfully. In whatever situation we're in, we always have to deal with people and have to communicate with people. Of course, we can follow these tips and it concerns us, but what to do if our friends and relatives run into serious problem? what to say in a difficult situation? Of course, it depends on the kind of problem and peoplr. One way to tackle it might be support, he needs to feel that he is not alone. People start criticising and make mistakes. That's why it's important to avoid it. The main thing to get across is to make him face facts. You should discuss the problem in details, consider various ways of handling the problem. The best thing to do would be to make positive suggestions. It also help your friend not only to get the right way, but psycologically will. To sum up, I'd like to say that there are a lot of difficult, unusial situations in our life.It's important to behave in right way, because our further life, our relationships depend on it. Besides it's our behavior, our manners, that show our personality, character.

http://speaking24h.com/2010/08/topic-talk-about-good-manners/